Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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