just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
How's work?
Spinning.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize