I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize
