i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
