"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
