It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Randomize
