I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
