I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
