You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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