im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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