thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
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