People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
you will always have a special place in my vag
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize
