whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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