Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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