Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
