so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Randomize
