toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
I love you.
Bad choice
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
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