I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
