oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
