yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I stole a fireplace last night.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Randomize
