what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
