I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
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