i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
