HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Randomize
