There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
