People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Randomize
