apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
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