i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
