Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize