i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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