she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
BRING THE BAGELS
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