He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
