After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
