rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize
