You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
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