Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
we made out on top of his cat.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
