Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(812): View more from Indiana

Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??

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(714): View more from California

Who was that guy you went home with?

(1-714): View more from California

Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.

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(678): View more from Georgia

Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.

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(+66): View more from Thailand

A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?

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(623): View more from Arizona

just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.

(623): View more from Arizona

and by single i mean slutty

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(989): View more from Michigan

I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.

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(303): View more from Colorado

apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...

(303): View more from Colorado

...it didn't...

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(727): View more from Florida

Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"

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