how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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