its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
