Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Randomize
