Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Randomize