Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Randomize
