I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
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