dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Randomize
