I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
