i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I think people are normalizing furries
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Randomize
