ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
