How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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