Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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