he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Randomize
