How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
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