Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
if i can run in heels then i can drive
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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